Tuesday, 24 January 2012

My (un)friend




I have a friend staying with me at the minute.
Not actually sure if she qualifies as a friend actually, but we'll roll with that.
She turned up sometime last week and already I'm asking myself when she's going to leave. 
It doesn't look like she's making any plans to move on anytime soon.
No plans that she's told me about at least.
I wonder if you know her?
Probably.
She gets around a bit.
From what I hear anyway.
Frankly, she's not even that nice to be around.
She's stubborn, impractical, sassy and very persuasive. 
I'm wondering at this point why I even let her in.
But without fail, she always turns up, exactly at the wrong time.
Really, her timing is impeccable - just when my to-do list has turned into a to-do book and I have deadlines up to my eyeballs.
And she barges in demanding that I put all of that aside and do ridiculous things like clean out the fridge (yes, oh miracle of miracles, that has actually happened) and google what geocaching is. 
Friend, why you no help me write my dissertation? (Chinese accent for that sentence!)
I really need to crack on with that monster.
So for now, even if she refuses to leave, I'm going to just put my fingers in my ears and scream LA LA LA in her face.
In yo face procrastionation.
You're no friend of mine anymore.

Wednesday, 18 January 2012

This one's for you

Here are the reasons why I haven't posted anything in a while.
Well, mostly I just really haven't felt like I could be bothered to.
And seeing as this is my blog and I can do what I like with it, that is reason enough.
But if your looking for a more legit reason (read: excuse) that is mostly boring, then here it is.
I hate reading posts on other people's blogs that have only been written because they feel like they have to post everyday so they just post something that is b-o-r-i-n-g because they can't think of anything else but omgosh absolutely have to post something, because holy cannoli think of the followers! What will the followers think?! 
And I didn't want to be that person, so I just took a little break.
And I have a dissertation on the go too. You know, no biggy.
Is it biggy as in piggy or biggy with an ie? 
Well really, I'm thinking to myself that that doesn't even matter. 
I've said once already that this is my blog, blah blah, so I'm sticking with biggy as in piggy.

I was thinking all of these things over while I was stood at the sink doing the washing up and I thought to myself holy Hannah Montana, I really hate doing the washing up.
And then I thought that a lot of people probably do a lot of their serious thinking whilst they're doing the washing up.
Now personally, I would choose the shower over the sink, both for personal hygiene and for deep thinking any day because then I can use up all of the hot water and wind Ross up, but we all have our preferences.
Am I right?

Anyway, what I'm basically saying is, I'm back, baby.

Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMA!
I dedicate this nonsense transmission to you.